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Say What?!

Muh Main Man desperately wanted to get himself Brainy Boy the nifty Schwitzer 300 RC helicopter that was for sale at the mall kiosk. It was way overpriced, I might add. In Nice Mom & Cool Wife form, I agreed, but through gritted teeth.

You see, we've been buying RC vehicles, helicopters and planes since, well...since we found out a boy was in the womb. And they work for about the first 15 minutes until one flies it into the woods. Or crashes it into the pavement. Or some mystery malady hits the battery. Then we sit the ailed aircraft on the kitchen counter until Easter, fully intending to fix or buy some new part for said toy. Eventually the piece of junk becomes part of the scenery and I can safely throw it out without anyone noticing it disappeared.

But anyway. We bought this one. And I cautiously admit that it has worked so far. It appears we've made a record because now we are three days post-Christmas without any permanent destruction. UPDATED: I take that back. As I'm writing, Brainy Boy has come in with the antennae broken in half. So there ya go. What'd I tell ya?

But this leads me to the process of getting the thing up and running in the first place. Apparently we've been graced with this piece of machinery from the far away land of China. Where else would it be from? And the hunk of fun-ness is rated for ages 14+. My kid is 11. Maybe that's the problem. The first statement I noticed on the box was "Caution: This is not a toys." Yeah, toys. As if they were giving us a Two-fer-one. Apparently Chinese-to-English translation isn't all that smooth.

Then, they proceed to explain that "The fly requires a warm weather with no wind." I didn't realize we were purchasing a fly, but it's good to know, nonetheless. The instructions also helpfully point out that the helicopter rotates "anticlockwise."

Perhaps the two most helpful cautions:
1) Do not play the chopper in strong winds, which can confuse your control. I totally hate it when my control gets confused.
2) Main rotor blades and tail blades and gear can rotate at very high speeds in your playing and therefore can inflict severe damage or injury to people especially from parts such as your face, fingers, eyes and hairs. And not just one hair either.

I think it was easier when our dads were putting together Radio Flyers on Christmas Eve.

Comments

Mary Ellen said…
I stood and watched a salesman playing with one of these in our local mall, seriously debated buying one for Michael - sounds like I made the right decision in not getting one. They sure do make it look like fun though! I vaguely remember seeing something on the news about how the ones they sell are different from the ones you see them playing with, etc. but the details escape me. Glad John...er Eric....got to enjoy it while it lasted!

PS I personally think it STINKS that you stayed home for Christmas instead of coming to FL!!!! "-)
Melanie said…
We saw these at the mall too- it does look like a lot of fun. I'm sure in a few years Rich will buying things like that for Hailey.

Those cautions are hilarious. I enjoyed several good out-loud laughs over those.
Laurie said…
Baahahahahha! I love your grammatical commentary on the Chinese to English translation. Tooo funny! I have thrown out my share of those things over the years too. It will be missed for a short time, until it's replaced by some other poorly-made but righteously-touted gizmo. You can always retaliate with another Pampered Chef necessity. Always makes me feel better! :)
Anonymous said…
I too saw these being demonstrated at a local Fry's Electronics store and thought what a great gift for myself. oops I mean my son.
The set I bought came with 2 that could fly against each other. I took them out of the package and charged them up and then proceeded to crash them into the ceiling and against the wall. I then realized my home doesn't have the airspace of a warehouse

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