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Dog Days of Exaggeration

I had a 6:30 pm PTA meeting last night during which Hero Guy generously offered to "babysit" even though he was on call for the ambulance. The meeting was at a house just a couple of streets down, so we agreed that I would run home should he get an emergency call. Once I got to the meeting, I realized I didn't have cell phone reception, so I called him to give him the house number where I was. Approximately 90 seconds later, the phone rung, and it was Hero Guy....already.

HG: Did you run over the dog when you left for your meeting?
ME: Um, no.
HG: Well, you must have.
ME: Why?
HG: The dog just came running in the house and her ear is half ripped off.
ME: O, NO! What happened?
HG: You must've caught her head under the tire.
ME: What other injuries does she have?
HG: Just the ear.
ME: Is she whining?
HG: No, I don't think she even realizes anything is wrong.
ME: What is she doing?
HG: Jumping up and down, wagging her tail.
ME: Put some peroxide on it--I'm sure it will be okay if she isn't acting like she's in pain. I'll bet she got after an animal over in the brush and it bit her, or maybe she even got caught in the pricker bushes.
HG: Oh, no, you definitely ran her over.

Upon returning home, I inspected the tattered ear. It was more like a 1/8-inch cut on the corner of her ear. I'm quite sure I would have never noticed it if I hadn't been looking for it. I'm not sure how Hero Guy even saw it when the dog came bounding in the house in her usual manner. This would be the very same dog that has encountered two rabid raccoons (one requiring all four of us to undergo the rabies vaccination series) and the same dog who has gotten sprayed head on by skunks, not once, not twice, but three times (including Sunday night as the in-laws were leaving our house). It would also be the same dog who has sneaked 2 birds into our house and who regularly feasts on field mice whenever I am adhering her to the low-cal diet the vet has her on. She acts absolutely thrilled with herself each and every time she encounters any type of wildlife--and that is often since we live in the boonies.

Somehow I'm thinking the almost visible nick in her ear will do just fine. And I'm also thinking there would've been a lot more indication if I had actually run her over with my van--like some yelping and broken bones maybe?

Comments

Anonymous said…
Remind my dear cuz that we have a little saying here in the good ole' USA - "innocent until proven guilty!" :-) If you were to run over him somehow I think more than an earlobe would have gotten under the tire.

Poor Johnny boy, he just so desperately needed some kind of horrific event to fulfill his hero quota for the night and instead he was left with only a small tatter on a dog's ear!
Anonymous said…
if you stare at the picture long enough....you can see the tire tracks running across his back. If you can't see them yet, keep looking.
Unknown said…
I think 'Hero Guy' just needed an excuse to call you.

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