Skip to main content

The Gift that Keeps on Giving

With Mother's Day coming on the heels of my birthday, Eric's birthday and John's looming right after Mother's Day is over, I've reverted to an age-old, time-tested method of providing reminders and hints via my daughter. I used to have to go right to the source and say that although I was positive John had picked out just the right gift for me, I saw 'so-and-so' that I'd really like. I didn't do this because John slacks in the gift department. He is a fantastic gift selector. I just needed to make sure he actually remembered....for my own peace of mind. Sly boy that he is, he usually had already made some sort of plans, but invariably, he'd add my suggestion to whatever gift he'd already lined up and I wouldn't have to fret all week that he had forgotten.

BUT, this year, I found a gift that I'll be giving to my children. It is the "Understand Your Mother peppermint flavor breath spray". I don't need to give it to my own mom, because her mother is in Heaven, and I actually don't need it myself, since the process of becoming a mother has the same effect as the breath spray--Mom's language and reasonining becomes instantly more clear and sane.

But I'm thinking that my children will actually be able to take advantage of the newfound knowlege this product promises. The advertisement assures "you will now instantly understand your mother".

IMAGINE: I say, "Sweetie, put your toys away" when in reality I mean "If you don't pick up that mess on the floor, the garbage man is going to be in for a real shock when I load the bins with all your prized posessions and then to ease my guilt, I'll have to run over to the Dress Barn and buy myself that new outfit for Mother's Day that I passed up last time I was there".

How does it work? No one seems to know. They say that perhaps the peppermint flavor activates special receptors in your brain, or maybe it works because the user really, really wants it to. It doesn't matter, though. My kids will thank me. Now I've just gotta watch that thought process and start saying what I really mean, in the most nurturing way possible, of course.

Comments

Rochelle said…
Yeah Jen, I hear your pain, and understand your delight with your new find....but I like this girl Crystal's idea! I could use some of this stuff too!
5/10/2006 4:55 PM
Rochelle said…
Yeah Jen, I hear your pain, and understand your delight with your new find....but I like this girl Crystal's idea! I could use some of this stuff too!
5/10/2006 4:55 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Mixed Feelings

It's been a long time in coming, but as of this morning, I'm no longer a medical transcriptionist. I'm not sure how I feel about that...a little bit relieved, a little bit sad, a lot bit uncertain about whether I'll regret this decision. For the last year or so, I've found that the transcription work isn't fulfilling the need I once had to stay at home with my babies and have an income. I've increasingly felt that I need more interaction and less monotony. I've also felt the pressure of work that constantly needs to be done, with no sense of ever being really "finished." No matter how much work you've done for the day, there's always another note waiting to be transcribed. That goes for sick days, holidays, vacations days or any kind of days. This year, I've dabbled in substituting as a school monitor and office staff, and kind of found my niche in the last few weeks. I'll be working a couple of hours a day in one of the ...
13 comments
Read more

Stickin' It Out

I got married today. Well, not exactly today. It was Friday, June 2. But the year was 1989 - 17 years ago. "Amazing", people say. "Good for you", they comment. "You must have picked the right one", the add. Amazing? Yes. Good for me? I'll admit it. But it has nothing to do with picking the right one, really. It's not because I found the perfect boy, and it's certainly not because he found the perfect girl. It might sound a little unromantic, but there never really is a 'right one' floating around out there waiting in the cosmos for the other 'right one' to crash and connect. There may be 'better ones'; there may be 'more easily compatible' or something or other. But the real story is you start becoming the right one the moment you vow that "you do". When I married, I had been 20 for a whole 33 days, we had just completed a 2-year long-distance realtionship and HE was five years older tha...
19 comments
Read more

Too Close For Comfort

Depressing: Def., "Realizing that you and your Dearly Beloved are entirely to close to wearing the same pant size. Case in point - Hero Guy came ' har har-ing' out of the bedroom relating that he had accidentally been wearing a pair of my jeans for the last 15 minutes. He wondered why they felt so weird (translated - TIGHT) until he took them off and inspected the tag. He gloated that at least he knows he can fit into a Ladies Size ___ (you really think I'm going to tell you the number?!). My Observations: 1) He had a MONSTER wedgie, so the jeans were entirely too small for him. 2) They are my "fat" jeans, a size bigger than what I actually wear, but I just like the broken-in feeling of them. Or the roominess or something. 3) They were the stretchy kind of jeans, so an elephant could have painted itself into them. 4) What's he bragging about having a girlish figure for anyway? Not very macho if you ask me. Hmph.
11 comments
Read more